Red Light, Green Light
by rymmkon
Summary: NicoMaki angst. Reupload because ffnet screwed up my formatting.


It was quite accidental.

Maki virtually never took her lunches outside the hospital. It was a hassle to walk so far to get a meal, only to have to walk back – and besides, what if the other doctors needed her for something? She usually just bought something quick from the cafeteria on the 4th floor before going back to work straightaway. Many of her coworkers relished the chance to stretch their legs and catch a breath of fresh air, but as future head doctor, she couldn't afford such a luxury.

That was what made this whole thing so much of an _accident_.

Maki had just _happened_ to look outside and long for sunlight (even she had her weak moments). The coffee shop around the corner just _happened_ to be closed for renovations, forcing her to go to the other one a few blocks down. The light at the intersection just _happened_ to turn red as soon as she approached it. And she had just _happened_ to toss her head in frustration, her eyes passing over the people arriving from the other side of the street. The sight of a short, twin-tailed girl in sunglasses and a quite stylish surgical mask made her heart slow just for a moment, and before she could stop herself, she had let out a confused, "Nico-chan?"

Really, it was a coincidence that the girl had heard her at all.

She halted her brisk steps and stood stock still, her expression inscrutable thanks to the dark lenses obscuring her face. Embarrassed, Maki struggled to find something to say. "Sorry," she mumbled. "You look a lot like someone I used to know. _Of course it isn't her_. The 26-year-old doctor turned away as the light finally turned green, but before she could continue on her way, the girl had reached out and grabbed her by the wrist.

"W-wait!" The faint hint of desperation in her voice did not stop Maki from recognizing its familiarity. The rest of the world seemed to grow quiet as the two gazed at each other, at a loss for what to say. In that time, the light once again turned red.

"Hey," Maki finally offered weakly.

"Hey."

"It's been awhile."

"Yeah."

The silence stretched on as the crowd pushed around them. Maki felt ridiculous trying to read what Nico was thinking behind the oversized mask. Just as she took a breath to try and continue the conversation, the older girl took off the accessories hiding her face. She looked Maki straight in the eye. Almost forcefully, she asked, "Do you want to find somewhere and sit down?"

Maki, still in shock from the chance meeting, could only nod. The two waited at the crosswalk, not saying a word to each other. Vaguely, she noticed that Nico had not let go of her wrist. In fact, her grip seemed to have grown tighter, as if she were afraid her former underclassman would run off.

They ended up at a diner right next to the coffee shop Maki was planning on going to. She picked an item off the menu at random and ordered it, scarcely even registering her choice. As they waited for their food to arrive, she excused herself.

"I'm just going to make a call to the hospital and tell them I'm taking the rest of the day off."

"Is that okay?"

"It'll be fine."

When she came back, their meals were already on the table. Nico waited until she was seated before digging in, and the two ate their meal, exchanging some perfunctory "How-have-you-been's" before lapsing again into silence. As she twirled her fork through her pasta, Maki struggled to think of something to say.

"I finally got scouted," Nico said suddenly. Maki swallowed the food in her mouth hard and looked up. Nico's eyes were averted from her gaze, and she played idly with her food while she continued, "I passed the audition for a new idol group. That's why I was wearing sunglasses. We've already released a few singles – but I guess we're not that well-known yet."

"Congratulations," Maki replied carefully. "I know you've been dreaming about this all your life. I knew you cou-"

"I wanted you to be the first to know," interrupted Nico. She still wasn't looking at Maki, her staring fixedly at the hamburger steak in front of her instead. "I wanted you to be the first person I told. I had my phone in my hand and everything. But then I remembered the last time we saw each other." She finally tilted her face up, and Maki could see in her eyes 4 years' worth of hurt and frustration brought on by how they last parted.

The doctor sighed. This was what she had been dreading. "Nico-chan…" she began gently.

"We could have done it."Nico was having none of it. "It would have been both of us, if you hadn't quit."

"You know that's not true."

"It is," the older girl shot back. "You just got lazy. You were afraid to take a chance."

Despite all her resolve not to, Maki could feel a small flicker of anger stirring inside her stomach. Nico had always been stubborn, she reminded herself – sometimes, beyond reason. "That's not true," she said again, determined not to raise her voice. "From the very beginning, you were the only one who had this dream." She shrugged. "The rest of us had to grow up at some point."

Nico clenched her fists. "Are you saying I haven't grown up?"

Maki shook her head, refusing to rise to the bait. "I'm saying that out of our group, you were the only one who could have made it. You were the only one who was serious."

"You promised me –"

"I had to face reality sometime, Nico!" Maki was surprised at her own outburst, but she couldn't help herself. "You might be cut out for the idol business, but I never was. I had a job to do, and no attempt to avoid it was going to hold it off forever. I accepted my fate, just like everyone else. We were all playing around, except for you. But then we had to become adults." _Except for you_ , she added to herself, and shuddered a little at the unexpected jealousy the thought was tinged by.

"Playing around," Nico repeated, her voice trembling. "That's all it was to you? All those practices? Those auditions? Those months of living together, those nights together?"

Maki bit her lip, cursing herself for her poor word choice. "Of course not," she muttered reluctantly. "You know how I felt about you. Don't even say that."

The fight seemed to leave Nico then, and for the first time, Maki realized how tired she looked. Her small frame looked even thinner than before. She wondered if the other girl had been eating enough and getting enough rest. Probably not. They finished the rest of their meal in silence. Maki insisted on paying for the bill, and Nico only put up a half-hearted protest before acquiescing. They made their way out of the diner together.

"Where are you headed now?"

Maki considered her options for a moment. "Probably back to the hospital. I know I told them I wouldn't be back, but there's work that has to be done."

Nico fidgeted. Maki waited patiently, and finally the shorter girl asked, "Can I ask you one last question?"

"Go ahead."

"Were you happy?" The words were so quiet and pained that Maki almost didn't hear them. She didn't need Nico to explain what she was asking about.

"Yes," she answered simply. "Those might have been the happiest days I'll ever have."

Nico nodded. They were at the crosswalk from earlier, and as the light turned green, she stopped Maki and began digging around in her pockets. "Wait." Pulling out a flyer, she pressed it into her old underclassman's hands. "We're having a performance next week. The venue's not big, but it'll be fun. Will you come?"

Maki looked at the flyer for a long time. Finally, she folded it carefully and handed it back. She took a deep breath and smiled, placing a tender hand on Nico's cheek. "No, Nico-chan. I won't."

Then, she stepped off the curb and walked away. The light turned red as soon as she finished crossing, and Nico was left behind, still clutching the flyer.


End file.
